{"id":1400,"date":"2006-06-02T08:22:00","date_gmt":"2006-06-02T15:22:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/2006\/06\/02\/youll-go-blind\/"},"modified":"2006-06-02T08:22:00","modified_gmt":"2006-06-02T15:22:00","slug":"youll-go-blind","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/2006\/06\/02\/youll-go-blind\/","title":{"rendered":"You&#8217;ll Go Blind"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Hasbro is advertising a new Super Soaker toy called the &#8220;<a href=\"http:\/\/www.hasbro.com\/default.cfm?page=browse&amp;product_id=17359\">Oozinator<\/a>,&#8221; which, in addition to water, expels &#8220;globs of gooey bio-ooze.&#8221;  Their words.<\/p>\n<p>If you can&#8217;t figure out what&#8217;s wrong with this picture, treasure your innocence.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/wigu.com\/overcompensating\/2006\/05\/summer-of-ooze.html\">Jeffrey Rowland<\/a> politely labels it &#8220;<span style=\"font-style:italic;\">insanely inappropriate<\/span>&#8220;, but <a href=\"http:\/\/www.tornblue.com\/2006\/05\/oozinator.html\">petey<\/a> doesn&#8217;t mince words: &#8220;Child pornography addicts, it&#8217;s your birthday.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I watched the video, not knowing what disturbing images lay therein, but I&#8217;m warning you to stay away.  SAVE YOURSELF!<\/p>\n<p>The horror&#8230; the horror&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hasbro is advertising a new Super Soaker toy called the &#8220;Oozinator,&#8221; which, in addition to water, expels &#8220;globs of gooey bio-ooze.&#8221; Their words. If you can&#8217;t figure out what&#8217;s wrong with this picture, treasure your innocence. Jeffrey Rowland politely labels&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_share_on_mastodon":"0"},"categories":[1,133],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1400","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"share_on_mastodon":{"url":"","error":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1400","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1400"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1400\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1400"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1400"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.curtiscchen.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1400"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}